Dear Doughnut Time,
Last night, we cheated on you. For some reason, we wanted to try something new. We’d found this new place that we had wanted to try for ages, and at the very least we thought it could be just as good as you. Oh how wrong we were. So, here it is: We bought six doughnuts from one of your competitors. And it will never happen again.
The Nutella-filled donut was a poor copy of yours. There was no oozing, no fluffiness, and no deliciousness. The dismal teaspoon of Nutella made the rest of the doughnut feel dry, with the cups of sprinkled sugar doing nothing to conceal the taste of fried oil. The caramel doughnut was nothing like Veruca Salt. Instead, the caramel tasted like an old, melted sweet that grandpas carry around with them: nothing like the delicious top-n-fill in yours. The remainder of the flavoured doughnuts were just as disappointing, with too much dough and not enough filling. They tasted almost sponge cake-like, with a disgusting aftertaste of oil.
How do you get your doughnuts so delicious? How do you balance the filling and dough? Why are you so perfect?
(Side note, I don’t even care if they gave us one for free. What’s the use in getting a free doughnut if it’s a bitter disappointment? I would rather pay an outrageous $36 for a six pack of your guaranteed delicious doughnuts, than experience disappointment like this again.)
We were lured by the desire to try something new, by deceptive Instagram posts showing oozing fillings, and the everlasting hunt to find the perfect fried dough. We are sorry.
We hope you can forgive us. We promise it won’t happen again. Unless, of course, it’s a desperate time and the urge calls. But unlikely.
Yours faithfully (from now on),
A Doughnut Time Lover
Senaai Chapple 
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